Bikram Yoga at Fierce Grace

I am not getting any younger and my body is not getting any tighter. I remember the good old days when my bottom was up and my arms were not flappy. As a matter of fact, even when I was fat (my fattie time lasted for about two years or so) things were still tight and in their right place.

But it’s a totally different story now, when I am in my early 30s. Basically, my bottom seems to be rushing down as if it’s having an urgent meeting with the back of my knees or something, and when it’s a bit windy I am afraid my hips and my arms will start flapping until the point I get up in the air.

Ok, I am over reacting, it’s not that bad, but it’s not good either. I wasn’t blessed with good genes, I never did any kind of sports, except for some aerobics and pilates every now and then and my body type is not helping me much. Short, big hips and small breast. Sort of like Shakira and Beyonce but not quite, hahaha.

The biggest problem is that when I put on weight 2-3 kilos, they go straight to my hips and belly, making me look as if I gained 10 kilos. If these 2-3 kilos had the decency to go to my breasts, I wouldn’t complain that much. Probably not at all. Well, maybe just a little bit, because bigger breasts would mean I would have to start wearing a bra and I am not much into that. I like going comando “upstairs”.

Because of all the reasons mentioned above and also because depression has decided to try to have its way with me again, I decided I should go to yoga. And not any kind of yoga, but the Bikram yoga, the hot and steamy one.

I have decided this a month ago (or more) but I finally got my ass to the studio yesterday. I was nervous as hell, I even asked the guy at the reception if it’s gonna kill me. I was determined to sit on my back at the first sign of fainting and even leave the class if unbearable.

But…I made it through the class! Yey me! And I didn’t stop at all and I did the poses better than I expected. That’s my personal opinion though. Considering I have no flexibility and endurance, I think I did great. I was so proud of myself, I felt like buying myself a nice, cold beer afterwards. But I didn’t.

I deal very well with everything hot: hot water, hot weather, hot pans, hot men so probably this helped a lot. The 50 degrees Celsius summer afternoons in Romania, when I was walking 3-4 kilometers from my office to my apartment were probably my foreplay to Bikram Yoga. They surely came in use now.

I went to a Fierce Grace studio for the simple reason I liked their website. They use average looking people to market their services and that’s brilliant!

Yoga classes are not attended only by lean people that can put their leg behind their head easier than I can climb on a stool to grab a jar from the upper shelf. And it’s good when studios mention this on their websites, to boost the clients’ confidence. That’s not my case as I am absolutely positive I am too good to be true, but I am just saying.

Two hours before the class you are supposed to have already drank 1.5 liters of water. I woke up at 10, my class was at 3 so I had to drink all that water in like three hours. I was drinking and peeing and drinking and peeing and drinking and peeing…

I arrived at the studio at 2.30. I peed twice until the class started. During the class I had more water, like 1 liter maybe, so once the class finished, I went straight to the bathroom, you can imagine. At one point I was seriously thinking I should change my name from Lavinia to Laweenia.

Then I took a hot shower (I know, I am crazy but I love a hot shower even if it follows a workout at 40 degrees Celsius) and it was quite an experience. I have never showered in the company of women before. I’ll probably get used to that.

The funniest thing was that when packing for yoga, it skipped my mind my knickers would be soaking wet as well, along with all my workout attire. So I had no choice but to go comando both “downstairs” and “upstairs”. It was a windy day and I had a summery, flowing dress, not very long, so it was quite challenging not to end up in a Marilyin Monroe pose.

Bikram Yoga got me exhausted. But good kind of exhausted. I felt serene and relaxed last night, even if I was dead tired. This morning I was still filled with energy so I went for jogging and working out in the park and it felt great. I am thinking I might even have a chance to finish the 5k marathon one way or another, walking or maybe crawling.

Bottom line, I am hooked to Bikram Yoga now. I liked everything about it and the easy going instructor helped a lot. I will keep doing it until I can put both my legs behind my head while sipping a coffee. (Not in this life, for sure, but dreaming is fun, right?).

P.S. Fierce Grace didn’t pay me to talk nice about them, ok? :)

 

How to get a Romanian woman to like you

Earlier today I was a bit bored (read I was heavily procrastinating) so I typed into google: how to get a Romanian woman to like you. And the marvel! Humanity have been asking google about this important matter since the beginning of times! Articles and thesis were written on the topic! Should I follow  up with a book, I wonder? Untitled

I started my education on the matter with an idiotic article in which the author was torn between how religious Romanian women are and how many Romanian women are prostitutes in Turkey and UAE. He just couldn’t find the missing link, poor guy.

I moved on to a better article. The content is mostly true but …there is always a but, especially when we are talking about women, these wonderful PMSing mysterious messes.

“First off, if you’re a foreigner trying to get a Romanian woman fall in love with you (…) the good news is you stand more chances than any potential Romanian male racing to win over the same woman. The truth is Romanians like foreigners, and Romanian women in general will give more attention to foreigners trying to win them over.”

Yes, Romanian women love foreigners. Somewhere at the end of the article, the author says this is because communism, when anything foreign was very rare. Yes, this is partially true. But…we like foreigners because Romanian men are not very cute, have horrible manners, they don’t really have any sort of culture (reading is a very extreme sport for Romanian men), by the time they are 30-35 they look like pigs (fat bellies, yak!), they don’t really consider helping the woman around the house because cooking, cleaning, raising children is not a man’s job etc. That’s why we want foreigners! Because most of our men are cave men!

I had my last Romanian boyfriend in 2009. He felt insulted when I told him he could cook for himself every now and then. (Don’t worry, I wasn’t slaving in the kitchen for him, his mother was). I have never seen any of my Romanian boyfriends reading a book. I never ever had a Romanian boyfriend with a general culture broader than mine and I am far from being a genius. Of course I called it quits! Can you blame me?

“If you’ve been in Romania for a while, you probably already know most Romanian women like to dress up for many occasions, and the level of ‘dressing up’ varies with the occasion, and of course, with the woman’s personality. But in general, appearance is important for Romanian women, and many like to have impeccable outfits.”

In my opinion, Romanian women are too dressed up. High heels when taking a walk in the park or going to school are a bit much, if you ask me. Romanian women dress up because they are stressed and pressured. There is nothing more important for them than what other people think. Everything they do is to impress so dressing up has the same purpose.

That is why they want their partner to be well dressed as well, so that other people won’t think: “Look at her, what a peasant boyfriend she found!” This is how Romanian brains work. For example, they stumble and fall in the middle of the street. First thought is not “oh my gods, have I broken a bone or something?” but “oh my gods, what do people think of me, falling like that?” So it’s not style. It’s low self-esteem.

“In general Romanian women like to cook, they learn it at home at early ages (there will be exceptions, of course), so if they have time, they will cook often.”

Oh, please! They don’t like to cook. They have to cook! Try to live on a Romanian income and you’ll be Jamie Oliver in no time.

I cook ok but I can’t say I like it. Most likely I don’t mind it. Anyway, I don’t cook every day and I never cook complicated dishes. Spending more than one hour in the kitchen is against all my beliefs. And when I cook for boyfriend he MUST keep me company. And do the dishes. Unless I want a bit of me-time and I send him away.

Because if a Romanian girl demands some me-time, the man must oblige! (The author forgot to mention this, and it is more important than life itself!)

 

 

How to write on your blog every single day

Obviously, I have no idea how to write on my blog every single day, considering my last entry is dated February 17th, but I needed a cool title to bring some readers over since I have lost them all.

The real title of this entry should be: “Why the hell haven’t I bothered  to drop a line since I had so many things going on, like: dealing with addiction, going to Romania to kick some people’s asses, a romantic getaway in Paris, starting a class and so on and so forth?”

The answer is because I am a lazy ass. And the best procrastinator ever. And because my own life overwhelms me. I am in too deep. I have a sister, three girlfriends, a boyfriend, a three-days-a-week job and three hours of school every Friday. Add up reading, some working out in the park and the mandatory ME – time and you can start feeling sorry for me. I am not cooking anymore,  I clean every other week and I stopped going to social events because I am afraid to make new friends. My schedule is pretty tight as it is, I can’t fit new friends in, I really can’t. I don’t know how people do it, honestly. Joggling with 40 hours of work a week, a partner, friends, children, home…Do they ever sleep???

Changing the subject…you are wondering about the addiction thing, right? Don’t plan an intervention, I am already over it. It was Harry Potter. I read all the books in one month and during that month he was my first thought, my last thought and all the thoughts in between. Now I am back to my first addiction, coffee. I am not giving up this one, no way.

I am so sorry I haven’t told you about my trip to Romania, it was quite funny once I solved the problem. What happened was that some people rented my apartment and then they decided they won’t pay anymore, not rent, nor bills, because and I quote “it is not fair you have two apartments and we have none”. Note to readers: my parents own an apartment, and my apartment actually belongs to a bank. It will be mine when I pay off my mortgage, that is when I am 56. But those people made me feel like a tycoon for a minute, then I remembered they were using utilities and I was paying for them, which made me book a plane ticket to Romania and go kick their asses.

As for my romantic getaway in Paris…it wasn’t exactly romantic. We mostly ate, but it was good. I now proclaim French cuisine my second favourite, after the Greek one. What’s with the tartar steak, really now? Why on Earth someone would eat raw meat?

The Girl You Left Behind by Jojo Moyes

I started reading The Girl You Left Behind last Thursday and finished it on Monday evening. It was quite a marathon considering the 500 pages, not to mention I also have a life!

I read the first fifty pages in a breath and I even mentioned the beautiful writing of this novel on my Facebook. And it was great writing for a while, but then…

So here is how the book is structured. There are two stories revolving around a painting, one story set in 1916, in a small village in France and the second story is set nowadays, in London.

The first story is absolutely amazing, from the way characters are built, to the emphasizing of fear and desperation of people living during the war. I especially liked the “humanizing” of the German commandant, the war seen through is eyes, how he was letting the villagers get away with breaking the law.

Then suddenly the story moved in Central London. I didn’t like Liv, the British character, but I am subjective, this has nothing to do with the writing skills of Jojo Moyes. I found Liv lazy and pitiful and she was obviously suffering from major depression, yet she was doing nothing about it.

Some details in the story didn’t make sense and that really really bugged me. I mean, when you barely manage to find 200 pounds for the Council Tax, you don’t go to a pub to Central London, to drink one glass of wine after another, then plan to take a taxi home. That would be something between 50 and 100, depending on how much you drink and you simply can’t afford that, if, like I said, you have to put so much effort in finding the 200 you need.

The love story between Liv and Paul seems forced, it doesn’t naturally flow like the one between Sophie and Edouard. I would have believed it more if they had met while he was investigating the case of the painting, the coincidence that he found out she had the painting after their first night together is so cheesy. The trial is too long and full of too many spectacular moments, it looks more like a trial in Ally McBeal, to be honest.

The Girl You Left Behind is inconsistent, in one word. At one point I thought it might be written by two different people. I read it that fast for the only reason that I wanted to see what happened to Sophie eventually and I tried really hard not to skip the modern story and move to the old one.

I don’t write reviews in general, unless I am asked to. But The Girl You left Behind drove me mad from all the reasons mentioned above and I had to express myself. The second story was unnecessary, if you ask me, Sophie, Edouard and the commandant could have stand by themselves without any problems.

I am not saying Jojo Moyes is not a good writer. She is a great writer but I believe she loved the story from 1916 better because she obviously gave it more time and thought. I appreciate that it was well documented, I like a writer that takes the effort to find small details about the setting of their story.

Why she failed to make me believe the second story is probably because she was on a deadline and she didn’t have the time. Just saying, but after all, no one asked me, right?

From Here To Eternity – The Musical

I went to see From Here To Eternity and I would like to take this chance to apologise to the entire cast for not being in the story 100% but I was feeling so poorly, that I almost didn’t go.  It was on a Monday night, after work and after a long weekend in Oslo.

I liked the story and it was beautifully staged. I loved the dancing and the music and most of all, as usual at plays, I liked the energy the actors sent from the stage. Last but not least, the old look of the theatre made me turn my head from the show many times. I am such a sucker for old buildings!

From Here To Eternity is a very bold musical, quite explicit in terms of words usage. There was a lot of sexuality implied, but nothing aggressive or of bad taste.

From Here To Eternity is set in Pearl Harbor, 1941, where the girls sing “don’cha like Hawaii”, the men of G Company sing the blues, and where even on an army base, love and desire are never very far away. When the troubled Private Prewitt falls for the kind hearted escort club girl Lorene, and when his platoon sergeant, Warden, embarks on a dangerous affair with his commanding officer’s wife, Karen, the lives of both men are set on a course they cannot control. As war approaches, the worlds of the four lovers and the soldiers of G Company are dramatically ripped apart. (source)

And that is all I am going to disclose, you better go see the play if you want to know more.

My favourite song was something with “love me forever today” in it but I couldn’t find it on youtube, so I invite you to watch my second favourite from the show, Fight the Fight.

Right now, my personal top looks as follows:

1. Tanz Der Vampire

2. Dirty Dancing

3. We Will Rock You

4. From Here To Eternity

5. Wicked

I haven’t decided what show I’ll go to this month. I really want to see the Book of Mormon and I hope to buy tickets this month but they will probably be for later on. I will keep you posted.