I dumped many men because I got bored of them. Not nice but why is this my fault? The deal is (unwritten deal) I take care of you, I keep you safe and you keep me wild. Is that so hard to achieve?
I dumped men for bragging or for being idiots or for being cheap (not with me, but with themselves, which is beyond my power of understanding).
Of course, I dumped men for not being good in bed, but, can you blame me? I do believe in good sex, I really do.
I dumped men for being cowards and I dumped men because I was more of a man than they were.
I dumped men for being liars, for being too soft or too harsh.
I dumped a man for being under a secret service surveillance (I don’t need that kind of attention), I dumped men for being too smothering, for being too much of a mama’s boy, for being too jealous, for being too demanding, for wanting me in the kitchen more than wanting me in the bedroom (if you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the fucking kitchen, boy!).
I dumped men for not being confident, for yelling too much, for being more complicated than I am (that is an achievement, believe me, not even Einstein could figure me out!).
I once dumped a man for not washing his hands after peeing. I don’t remember how I began suspecting it but once I had the first hints I started sneaking to the bathroom door to listen to the sounds. I was going mental, I needed to know. The night I got my confirmation he cooked dinner after coming out of the bathroom. I said I was not hungry and I ordered a pizza later on. I waited for the pizza guy at the door, to make sure he won’t touch it before I get a slice or two, I was totally starving.
On the other hand, he would find gross my habit of going my fingers through my hair, especially while eating. And he was always, always scolding me about it. As for me, I never told him the reason why I left him. I thought it was too embarrassing for him and anyway, if a man didn’t learn to wash his hands after peeing by the age of 30 something, is not my job to teach him.
And of course, I dumped men over spelling and I will always will. If you can’t spell in your mother tongue and I figure it out, you are dead to me. I don’t mind spelling mistakes in your second language, though. I don’t care that much for punctuation either. But spelling, wow, sometimes I feel like killing people over spelling, honestly.
Other than that, I really love men, I really really do!